Aleuromancing the Stone

Wordloaf remains on an extended beach/catch-up-on-sleep holiday, but I am popping in momentarily to share something I promised ages ago: the results from Jennifer Billock's bread divinations! Thank you for all your submissions, I hope the four winners find good tidings in Jennifer's readings. And thanks to Jennifer for volunteering to do this!

Jennifer is available for bread and other readings at cheeseoracle.com, and you can follow her in all the usual places at @thecheeseoracle.

—Andrew

Thank you so much to everyone who submitted such lovely bread photos for fortune telling! I wish I could read everybody’s, but even if you weren’t picked, I’m in awe of your baking prowess. My last loaf was a blue cheese walnut sourdough that didn’t rise at all and tasted… kind of awful. But we bake and we learn.

OK, onto the fortunes! Thanks to my trusty bookmarked Wheel of Names, the folks getting divination in this post are: Jonas S., David E., Toby B., and Lori D. Congratulations! Here’s what the loaves had to say about you. For each one, I have marked up the image with various colors to point out what I see.

Jonas S.

The first thing I see in your bread is a paw print (pink box). That means there’s a companion in your life; someone you can trust and that can trust you right back. It is upside down, though, which means that there may have recently been a bit of a break in trust. Be sure to hear each other out fully and not jump to any conclusions — even though the smirking face (dark blue circle) makes it seem like you REALLY want to say “I told you so.” It’s not worth it, trust me. In the middle of the slice is a flower (green shape). This is an indication that if you hold back on your “I told you so”s, there’s a good chance for personal growth with the results of any major conversations in mind. Don’t be too stubborn to notice it.

You have a spirit guide in your bread (red circle), and that tells me that someone or some creature that passed on in the last few years is watching over you, helping make sure you make good decisions for yourself and generally feel alright about your life. You can lean into that energy through targeted meditation or a spirit guide meditation (plenty of them on YouTube if you search).

Above that, in the light blue circle, it looks like a sword has speared a piece of meat. This represents an accomplishment you’re about to achieve. The letter F (yellow circle) is somehow related, whether it’s in the name of a person working with you, the name of a project, or even the town you meet your goal in. Don’t be afraid to give yourself the credit you deserve for a job well done. You put a lot of work into this accomplishment, so let your star shine.

David E.

The bottom loaf in your image is one giant anchor (light blue). That’s great news! It means you’re in a place right now (or will be soon) where you’re feeling grounded and settled. You’re happy with where you’ve landed in life and there’s a solid base of contentment. There is one small spot where the loaf surface breaks between the middle and right side of the anchor; that could mean that even though things are generally in a good place right now, you’re not entirely sure if you believe it. Have faith! You have a lot of inner strength that you can rely on to feel more grounded.

The dense crumb in your slice tells me you have a lot going on at the moment. I’m worried you’re trying to take on more than you can handle, both of your own concerns and other people’s concerns. Remember to care for yourself before you care for anyone else. You can’t fill from an empty cup. And also remember that everyone else’s problems are not your problem. It will benefit you to put your foot down and express boundaries. You won’t get anywhere solving issues for everyone but yourself. There’s a splitting path at the top of your slice (dark blue), which means you have a decision coming up that you need to make. Lean into your intuition — your gut will tell you which path to choose. One option will feel more comfortable and one will feel more outside your comfort zone. I think the comfort level here is important, so keep that in mind when decision time comes.

There’s a person dancing on the left side of your bread (yellow), which means a celebration is on the way. It happens in the lead-up to the choice you have to make, and I think this revolves around work in some way. You achieve something big work-wise, and then it leads to an opportunity you can choose to take or not. On the right side of your bread, you have the skull of a demon (pink). This tells me there’s someone in your life right now who is possibly not the best influence. I want to encourage you to remember exactly who you are. Don’t lose yourself in someone else or their activities, even if it seems really exciting.

Toby B.

First, those bagels look delicious! I was so tempted to tell your fortune with them, but the loaf had more to say right away, so I went with that.

Immediately, I see a sloth on the left side of your bread (pink). Have you been taking a pretty long time to make decisions lately? The sloth is a rather literal expression of slowness. Try to be a bit more action-oriented, because part of your life is being slowed down by indecision at the moment. Well, maybe not indecision — I feel like you know what to do, you’re just taking a while to pull the trigger. What are you waiting for? Think carefully about what’s causing you to delay this path and whether it’s worth it for you.

You have a trident on the other side of your loaf (yellow), which is an indication that there’s something going on right now, or is about to be, where you feel like you need to be in control. I’m wondering if the trident is the reason for your sloth. Are you married to a process of some sort that’s keeping you from breaking free from a pattern and moving forward with more gusto? It’s an important exercise for you at the moment to embrace the idea that you can’t be in full control of everything all the time.

Outlined in the light blue rectangle is a journey line with a hole at the top of it. I feel like there’s a theme here, I’m sorry to say, of taking a journey but then not being able to finish what you started. The journey line shows progress, but the hole shows a lapse of attention. I recommend making a list of any unfinished projects and then writing out the steps you need to take to finish each of them. That way they don’t get lost in the hole at the top of your journey line. Once you do that, you can embrace the butterfly (red) at the top of your loaf, which is an indication of transformation and growth.

Lori D.

The first thing I see in your loaf is a giant number 5 (red). That means that the number 5 is relevant to your life in some way right now, either in a phone number, an age, and address, or something like that. Keep an eye out for 5s in your everyday life, and if you start to see them more often than you used to, pay attention to what’s going on around you. There’s a pattern in there somewhere for you that you can learn from.

Next is a goose head and a goose butt (dark blue). They’re following one another like they’re walking in a line. I feel like you may be struggling to break outside of your comfort zone a bit, instead choosing to stay in a place where you follow all the rules, everything feels safe, and you don’t have any surprises. And while there can be benefits to that mindset, right now you’re hampering your own growth. Get out and do something you would normally never do this week, something with a lot of people involved — I think you’ll meet either a new friend or a new relationship and you’ll also be encouraged to branch out in a new way. It’s easy to stay at home in our little boxes. Don’t be so easy on yourself.

You have a couple drama masks in your bread (pink), the kind that you see at theaters. Do you have a background in acting? If not, this could be something you have a surprising level of skill in, and I encourage you to give it a shot with an acting class or an audition for a local play. If you DO have an acting background, it’s time to lean deeper into it. You need the creative escape.

I also see two people having a discussion sitting at a table (yellow). This means there’s a deep conversation coming up for you soon. It doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad — the bread isn’t cracked or holey here — but definitely something impactful. Remember to keep an open mind and set emotional boundaries. Everything will work out, just compromise.

Thanks to everyone who indulged this little flight of fancy with me. And if you want to book a divination session with cheese, bread, curry, bacon, or any other food or drink, please shoot me an email at kitchenwitchjen@gmail.com!